My Car!
by Aquade
Summary: "Skipper? Do you ever wonder whose car we keep blowing up?" asked Private. The other penguin shrugged, closing the report he was finishing. "Not really, Private. Why?" "Well, it just struck me how it always is the same guy." Skipper rolled his eyes. "Some people just have worse luck than others, Private. It's how the world works."


**Hey, all you fanguins! It's me again with another one-shot! I'm sure you've all already guessed what this one is about from the title. Enjoy!**

**Reviews are encouraged!**

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**Disclaimer: I do not own the Penguins of Madagascar, nor do I own any of the characters/fictional places mentioned in the series. Dreamworks Animation and Nickelodeon own them. I _do _however, own this story line and idea.**

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"Skipper? Do you ever wonder whose car we keep blowing up?" asked Private.

The other penguin shrugged, closing the report he was finishing. "Not really, Private. Why?"

"Well, it just struck me how it always is the same guy."

Skipper rolled his eyes. "Some people just have worse luck than others, Private. It's how the world works."

"Yes, but don't you think we should – I don't know – visit him or something? Even if it's just to say we're sorry for blowing up his cars?"

Skipper groaned. "We're not the only ones who do it!"

"True, but we _do _do it the most."

Rico and Kowalski came down from their recon. "The zoo's clear, Skipper. Plus, Alice took away the lemur's music player, so we should have a good night's rest." Kowalski grinned.

Rico nodded. "Uh huh. All clear."

Skipper smiled proudly. "Well done, boys. In fact, I think we should all take a trip for some snow cones."

Rico raised his flippers up before rushing out of their HQ. "Snow cones!"

Skipper sighed. "Kowalski, go up and stop him before he yells it out to the whole world. I don't want the lemurs tagging along again."

"Aye, sir."

Skipper climbed up the ladder at an easy pace, Private right on his feet. "Skipper, since we're already going to the park, can we just search around for the car owner?"

Skipper closed his eyes for a second before groaning. "Fine. If it'll help you sleep at night as well as keep you from nagging me."

Private beamed.

"Although I'm not sure he'll still be in New York. I mean, there was that one time he went to China for a vacation, remember?" continued Skipper.

Private frowned, shaking his head. "No, I don't think so, sir. Were you on a solo mission?"

Skipper widened his eyes, surprised. "You weren't there?" He paused for a while, thinking. "Oh, yes. That was when Blowhole Mind Jacked me."

Private shivered. "I do hope that doesn't happen again."

Skipper smirked at the younger penguin. "Me too, Private. Me too."

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"No, Rico. Stop!" Kowalski launched himself at the specialist, knocking both of them down.

The penguin looked up at him crossly. "Eh! What was that for?"

Kowalski got up sheepishly. "Sorry. Skipper's orders. Says he doesn't want the lemurs tagging along again."

Rico rolled his eyes. "Come on then." He led the way to the park.

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"Now, Skipper? Since we already finished our snow cones?" pleaded Private.

Kowalski inclined his head. "What's he going on about, sir?"

Skipper cracked open an eye. "He wants us to search for the unseen 'My Car!' guy."

Kowalski frowned in thought before whispering something to Skipper's ear. The leader brightened up. "Brilliant work, Kowalski!" He turned to Private. "All right, soldier. You get your wish."

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"This was not what I meant when I said find him," whimpered Private.

The penguins were standing on top of a ledge overlooking the street. Standing at nearly twenty floors high, they had a decent view of the surrounding area. Rico held the bomb, his back facing the view. "Ready!"

Skipper grinned like a mischievous prankster. "All right, Rico. On my mark, you throw that bomb down, all right?"

Rico nodded, a similar expression on his face.

"In three. Two. One. Mark!"

The bomb sailed over Rico's head and down before hitting a car in a fiery explosion. A man ran out of the adjacent building. "My car!"

Kowalski pointed. "There he is, Skipper."

Skipper launched a line to the other side of the street, the hook securely shot through a piece of fencing from a one-story house. "Go! Go! Go!"

Private slid down, hanging on the clothes hanger. Kowalski was right behind him with Rico as third. Last, Skipper zip lined down. The four flipped to the ground, immediately finding some cover. Private pointed at the guy, now talking to two policemen. "Skipper! Over there!"

Skipper turned. "Blast. His back is on us. Assume the right positions, men."

They skillfully maneuvered their way until they were directly in front of the man. "Private. Show yourself."

"But Skipper-"

"Just do it."

Private sighed before popping up, waving at the man. The guy froze in the middle of his sentence. "Did you just see that?"

The police officers turned around. "See what?"

"The penguin….." he trailed off.

One of the officers looked at him kindly. "Listen here-" he looked down at his notes. "—Steve. Have you been drinking lately?"

Steve shook his head. "No, but-"

"Do you mind taking a test for us?"

He sighed. "What do I need to do?"

Private turned to Skipper. "He seems like a nice guy, Skipper. Perhaps we should give him some fish as compensation."

"Right." Skipper nodded to his teammate. "Rico?"

Rico climbed up to a lamppost before regurgitating a pile of canned sardines on Steve, knocking him down. Private gasped. "I hope he's all right!"

Skipper brushed it off. "Eh, he'll be fine. How much did you give him, Rico?"

Rico shrugged. "Few hundred?"

Kowalski took out his abacus. "According to current exchange rate…. That should be correct."

"Aces, Rico."

Kowalski shook his head. "I still have _no _idea how you fit so many cans of sardines in you." He glared at Rico. "I hope you didn't go raiding the zoo's warehouse again."

Rico smiled nervously. "He he."

The three slid back to the zoo, Private following at a slower rate. Presently, Skipper slowed down to slide beside him. "What's wrong, Private?"

"I just don't feel right burying him in sardines like that."

Skipper groaned. "Urgh! Make up your mind, soldier! You wanted to find the man, and we did. What more do you want?"

"Maybe to visit him in the hospital," suggested Private.

Skipper deadpanned. "Not gonna happen."


End file.
